MUSINGS

A small step for man, one giant leap for Mankind

2012-01-19T04:48:00.003+05:30

The moon whispers to the sky
That some men came there bustling by
The ridges and craters they did not see
Nor did they listen to the silence of eternity
They hoisted a flag on a leveled base
Which does not even flutter with grace

And left without thinking about the wonder

Of the stars, the sky, the thunder

Inspiration

2011-10-26T23:32:00.000+05:30

I fumble, I pause, I halt
I get blamed for it being my fault
Couldn't it be a temporarily lapse
Or just a bad day, perhaps
But, such a day comes in our life
When for each action one needs to strive
The failure should inspire in you the will
'Cause of the confidence that people have in you still
That for this event you were given a call
That no matter what, the world can be yours.

Death

2011-10-25T03:38:00.001+05:30

No appetite for the sea, an empty pale
The boat stops rocking, no wind in the sail
Ravaged by the high seas, the captain wants to rest
Like a brown leaf drop into the ground, it knows best
So is the wish, the I want to be
Forgotten from memory be the end I see

Pandal Hopping

2011-10-02T03:59:00.001+05:30

The festivity was at its prime
With joy and pleasure in the clime
Swift business happened in all the shops
The idols, the lights and all the props

Sweetmeats and drinks and meats all galore
For all child's wants she got a little more
New saris and dhotis were fashioned around
The carnival full of din and palpable sound

I was in awe of the happiness in the air
A welcome change from my desk and chair
A loin clothed man then disturbed my scene
Of the jubilance that my eyes had seen

The ragpicker creeped to the nearest dump
His head deep down, searched for the occasional bump
Like a shaggy dog to get a morsel to eat
Ignorant to his surround which were so neat

I sit now at my chair and he is in my thought
Why he was at the fiesta, I wish it was not
To eat from garbage, did You write his destiny so?
Why then my brother had to fall so low?

The last two months

2011-05-30T00:08:00.002+05:30

The following is not in chronological order. Some points that I would like to always remember.

1) Going inside a house, only to come out after 20 minutes to see a suicide due to poverty and alcohol a few houses away.

2) Dancing to drums for Didi's phenomenal win and welcoming an era of change by rubbing each other with green 'gulaal'.

3) Visiting 6*10 sq. ft. homes of daily wage earners with four family members.

4) The status of God being endowed to the children of the family.

5) How geography and history play a vital role in decisions of people.

6) Meeting a rickshaw-puller cum pimp in a hill station saying of only one thing when asked of places worth 'seeing'.

7) Finding the BOP being more hospitable even when constrained with extreme poverty compared to 'the people living in flats and kothis.'

8) Travelling in all modes of transport except for a bullock-cart or a horse back.

9) Speaking Bengali.

10) Working in the summer sun at 48*C, and still surviving it successfully.

To kill a mocking bird

2011-04-30T12:46:00.004+05:30

"It is a sin to kill a mocking bird" said Atticus, in the novel 'To Kill a mocking bird'. The novel revolves around the trial of a negro, who is not guilty of the charges of having raped a white girl, but the jury unanimously believes otherwise. The negro finally is battered with 11 bullet holes while he tries to run from the jail.

The preface and the description on the cover tell you the same story, only in some different words. Yet, it looses to give due attention to another killing. There is the murder of innocence and purity of Scout, the protagonist, who has been characterized as being in the 2nd grade. The child in her is murdered as she becomes a lady at ten. She observes her aunt and her neighbors as 'behaving' that way when they get to know about the Negro's death and slowly she too starts 'carrying' herself around. I wish to express my views on such transformation, but there is another killing of the mocking birds, which is currently taking place in most of the households that I see around that I want to discuss. The figurative 'killing' of the child.

India has 1.2 billion people living in it, with 30% of the people below 14 years. If you ask mothers about the routine of their kids, they would tell that their child goes to school at 6 in the morning, comes back at 1 pm, takes his/her lunch, studies till 4 pm, goes for tuition at 5pm, returns home at 9 pm, has dinner and goes to sleep. This grind happens 5 days a week. Non-stop.

Don't the mothers see the mocking birds in their children? Where is the time for the birds to sing? What a shame that the children have been gifted with wings to fly, but have had them clipped by the social pressure of studies. Why are the children forced to conform to the rat race before they even know the pros and cons of being rats?

I wish rather than running and making haste to their schools at 6, they would have been suggested to pause and look at the red of the sun. Just to get the warmth and the freshness to fly in this world rather than race like the rats.

On the flight back home!

2010-10-10T11:42:00.000+05:30

I was recently reading about ‘experiential marketing’ on ‘Marketing Practices’, a blog by an IIM L professor on how marketing has evolved towards it. The example of HUL coming out with websites like ‘I am beautiful’ for its products like Ponds, Dove and Lux where customers share their product experiences from which HUL gains customer engagement are all recent examples of experiential marketing. I too have an example to showcase something on the same lines.
Today, I was travelling from IIM C to Delhi on an Indigo flight. As soon as the plane was level in the sky, the airhostess rolled their cart with food items. On asking them for a Coke, which unfortunately they were out of stock, I was quite surprised when after sometime they came back with a glass of Pepsi, offering it to me free of cost. They said that it was theirs and were not feeling good that they were not able to serve their customer well.
I believe that even though Indigo is the most low cost airline in the Indian market today; such experiences would delight the customers. This would ultimately lead to customer retention and royalty, with this becoming a win-win game for both the parties involved.
PS: just waiting for the Indigo IPO to happen ;)

CV

2010-09-21T22:51:00.002+05:30

got done with CV making

what i learnt
1) IT work-ex does not count as 50% ppl have IT work-ex. If you want to show that you have done something different, do something different.
2) for finance, it is your acad record that matters. So, if you can still come up with a lot of patents, papers etc. , please do.
3) for consulting, considering that there are only 20 jobs in the big 4 for 1 campus, be different. National archers, international chess players, pilots after engineering, helicopter training, conquering mountain peaks, all count. Show that you have taken some initiatives. Be an entrepreneur, help NGO scale new heights. Winning national level case study competitions gives you the oomph.
4) for marketing have a lot of positions of responsibility. Manage big events somehow.
5) certifications give you added advantage. CFA for example.
6) the extra I in IIITA would always hurt. keep that in mind.
7) some guys can have a CGPA of 10/10 in undergrad. how would you compete with them?
8) National football players. Well, some of the recruiters might know them. Why would recruiters want know you?

i know that these might sound like big words. They are. But then, there are bigger achievements of people whom you will meet at elite institutions. Preparing for CAT is easier compared to such accomplishments.

Now just think about this for 2 minutes. .... ' how ready are you to give the CAT?'

Agony

2010-07-18T03:28:00.003+05:30

Close those eyes.

Try to see those dots in the black sky, like stars.
Shimmering bright. Moving down.No, right.
And then a sudden push and to the top.
Off they go.
And these red and green and blue dots.
As if dancing in tandem, slow, with elegance.
And then this Tandava, like Shiva circling, with fury, the energy causes this spark, and, then the flames.Like Shiva circling.

And then the rain, the wetness.
Drops, like filling the thirst of the flames.

And then, agony.

Agony can be beautiful. Enjoy it.

The Language

2010-05-23T15:41:00.003+05:30

Languages are funny. In a very recent chat with one of my friends, even though I wanted to appreciate her being sane, it came across as if I wanted to mean otherwise.
It is said that words are stronger than words. Right now, even I am feeling the same. Hope she forgives me.

I saw Kites yesterday and even though I might not give it a review which might make someone shell some money for it, I would still say that I did like the concept of the language sans the words. I like the way Hrithik and Barbara were trying to communicate through emotions, through their teary eyes, or the smiles.

I believe that in this information age, where everything is in white and black, we have somehow forgotten the art of alternative communication.

In the few days before going to IIMC , that is exactly what I want to learn,in the form of painting or music.
Just to express myself better.

B.Tech Over

2010-05-22T14:13:00.001+05:30

\m/

THOUGHTS ON HRM

2010-05-03T12:51:00.001+05:30

I was just wondering what the driving force is for a man. I understand this is a very abstract as well as a very subjective question. But seeing Chak De India for the 10th time made me ask that.
But to break down this question and to give a bit of a direction to this article, let us take into consideration all the organizations that we see around us and how in particular an organization can develop from various aspects to this question. The first and the foremost kind of organization that we see around us all is the one which is in us , ourselves. As we move to the higher layers of the hierarchy that is the society, the next layer is the institution of family. With the trend of nuclear family coming in, the extended family layer has somehow disappeared. The next sense of belonging comes from the schools that one goes to. May be the reason that the schools find a place therein is because the time that one spends there and in due course the friends that one makes and the learning that one imbibes in in there. Analogically, it should be the corporation that one works for which should come in the next layer of ones social hierarchy. Unfortunately, for many organizations, that is simply not the case. Why, let us think on that front.
What I like about Chak De is the temperament that the coach shows towards building a team. Before the players actually starts playing, what the coach indulges the individuals to do is to build the team. Having seen the IT industry for the past few months, the time that the organization has to build the team is quite less, and moreover unfocussed, with the individual being in as many as 5 teams. In this globalized world where every organization is short on time to roll its products, alternatives need to be found to build this organization.
Below I would be discussing about methods on how to build such an atmosphere for the junior employees, who mostly work for only 1 team and who have the luxury of time at their hand. The same may be from my 3 months of experience or just a result of my imagination.
I believe the lunch table is the most important place where such a thing can be done. It is extremely important that each of the players (yes that is what I consider each employee to be) share a common interest, so that there is no barrier in the flow of information. I believe that in addition to the responsibilities of the team manager to give direction to the product that his team is developing, the soft skills of giving direction on the discussions on the lunch table are as integral to his job. Software in many aspects is a projection of the real world in the digital format. Imagine the efficiency that an organization would achieve when the philosophy of software or the design aspects of their product and a debate on the type of pattern a product is based on gets discussed at the lunch table. Also, due consideration, time and attention should be given to each member of the team, surveillance by the team manager, giving everyone a sense of belongingness and appreciation for them pitching in their ideas. Is there wastage of time in arranging the whole team to go for lunch and making the others sit while a slow eating person finishes his food? The trade-off would always be there, but well, it would be better than them browsing social networking websites individually.
This brings me to the second method on how to make the team gel. Allow employees to share social information as well. With the kind of job that they do and the kind of hours that they put in working in IT, it would be impossible for them to perform at their best without some break. Let that be done in the form of discussion on an article or a video session or a tutorial or a really funny joke that they would have read in a magazine or heard on the radio. Let them be a bit informal amongst themselves. The team manager should facilitate the same, but not become a part of it, lest he is started to be taken for granted. In addition to the same, have a methodology of monitoring the time that an employee spends to browse such websites, and let them be aware of it.

In my observation, employees in a rung of the corporate ladder learn and would try to ape either the ones who are immediately above them (in a vertical organization) or the senior most (team manager in a horizontal organization) in their corporate reach. Both of the classes should be made aware of this special responsibility. The loyalties and the sense of belonging that an individual develops for an organization are set in the first 100 days of his work there. It is this sense of belonging ultimately that drives an employee. In addition to inculcating this feeling , it would also give this employee that his team members and in a broader sense the organization cares for him , his efficiency, his knowledge enhancement or simply wants to know him better. An informal relationship between the employees does not really hurt, till the time it is not competing with the employee’s service time.
To top this whole up, a team outing or just eating outside on the weekends would be a great idea, and better with some of the members being topsy-turvy with the team member. Or a game of Werewolf or T.T during their breaks.
I know ‘Chak De!’ is a bollywood flick and the chances of something happening like that in reality are very slim, but getting inspired and giving such things a thought never hurt anyone.

EVERYONE’S A DOG….OR A CHICKEN

2010-05-03T12:49:00.001+05:30

The discussion of the need of a gym in my life has crept-in in all the conversations that I have with my family. Sometimes recurring seven or eight times a day when I talk about finding myself a girlfriend ( kindly note how important the search is to me that I am talking 7-8 times about it in a day …. And that too to my family … and yes…forgive me if the word ‘finding’ is offensive …. Yeah … I am a feminist … if that lets me gain some brownie points) and the only roadblock I can identify that in so many years of my existence why I haven’t been able to do so is the lack of a Sunny Deol body.
I don’t look that bad … just to keep everything straight .Except for the unasked potbelly that I get after every meal of the day for a few hours, the rest of the time I am quite lean to look at. My sister tells me that that’s like the ‘in – thing’ but I believe it is only to keep my spirits high. Thankfully she understands the need to do that. For a 21 year old guy who has been written off by all the girls he has met as just another sweet and fun guy (well …. I like them considering me that, but not just just that …. Come on…) it can be pretty hard to hit the gym. How can one let the balance sheet of exercise be so skewed that except for getting a hulk-kind of body, you get no other benefits, after shelling about 15 KFC buckets at Talwalkars each month.
According to some experiments conducted in the wild wild west, a dog needs daily snacks to learn a newer trick or to forget a bad habit, little electric shocks to tell him to mend his ways in a course of a month (the nature of the experiment confirms that it was indeed conducted in the west where they are so wild not to understand such an intuitive thing). The results of the same experiment are also employed in organizations where employees are given smaller tasks and are rewarded with every new trick(read technology in the IT space) that they learn ( Dear Tom , Dick and Harry …. Yes! Your job is no different than Tommy, Cherry or Goldie learning their own set of tricks.)
And so even I am in the search of my mentor (this is much better a word. I wanted to use ‘master ‘but well that would have given my to-be girlfriend a wrong idea. I am not looking for a client-server configuration , I want our relationship to be on the P2P pattern … well , just to make myself clear ; and then people ask me how I am that optimistic. And yeah! I can sometimes be that geeky … just in case that helps my profile in your list of prospective candidates , hoping that I am there) , who would give me the snacks( :P ….) when I do my trick right( go to the gym ) and give me electric shocks ( well , don’t take that literally ) when I act bad ( skip the gym). Constant appreciation is needed.
But Alas! This is the same viscous circle, who would come first in my life, the girl or the gym. The chicken or the egg question needs to be answered…..just to draw an analogy. But in reality, I am the chicken …. who is enjoying his KFC.( better get rescued by the beautiful girls of PETA before the Kernel fries me up.)

Affirmative Action

2010-05-03T12:47:00.001+05:30

I feel like taking a long sojourn and travel India. In just more than a month and a half, I am going to join amongst the most coveted institutions of India, IIMs. With the reputation of going to the place comes the responsibility of what the education imparted there is going to teach us. That is exactly why I want to travel the length and the breadth of India; to spread a bit of awareness amongst people. I believe that it is a very small time to do that, specifically for the purpose I want to derive from it. And so I would start from my family and the peripheries of it.
It pains me to see that most of the candidates coming from the affirmative action of reservation constituted by the government of India into the hallowed portals of the elite IIMs are the ones who have done their under-graduation from another such national institution of repute. Since it has not been more than 3 years when reservation for OBCs was made they might be exempted from being in our sample set. But nonetheless, the government has invested us tax payer’s money in their under-graduation study.
The problem that I see in the implementation in the affirmative action and its rewards not being realized by the ones who really need is the lack of accounting in the same. It is understandable that when there is no record of a student, the accounting of whether the student is genuinely in need for reservation is extremely difficult. But cannot a centralized database of the students of national universities be made? I believe the system of book-keeping is there, my alma- mater had, what just is required is sharing of the data. And with the UID project going to realize itself in the next four years; we could have this accounting happening at the grass-roots level. At least a considerable amount of seats can then go to the ones who actually deserve it.
But I cannot see that happening. With the state of politics in our country, I have my doubts about any member of the parliament coming up with such a suggestion in the near future. Nor is altruism an inherent part of us. What then is required to at least let everyone know that there is something like a reservation for them. One of our chauffeurs and his family at my place come under the OBC category. Talking to him just a few days back after seeing in first person the fallacies in the implementation of the so called affirmative action I realized that he had no idea what reservation is. He knows that the Dalits have found their new found power and confidence due to their vote bank, but how?
Hope the government realizes the latent potential in spreading the news into the rightful candidate’s ears. Hope the rest of the General masses spread it through word and mouth rather than feeling sad for themselves. Hope the UID project realizes itself on schedule, a rarity in our nation. Hope education rises above being just a dog eats dog business for students. Hope.
The above would not mean benefits in the short run. The gap between the deserving and the benefiter is huge. But it would guarantee that the ones who have taken benefit once are again not standing in line once again for the benignity of the government. In two three generations down the lane, may be the lines would actually be made of people who actually need that benignity.
And I hope to see , and I know it is too distant to be seen , but even though the government has it lines, nobody actually wants to stand in them .

My IIMC interview

2010-04-12T23:19:00.003+05:30

o.k. This post had to be made. Because the call got converted. Serendipity. I always liked that word. It came true. I like the statements I hear ;" I am proud of you". The surprising thing is that I did not have any tangible preparation. May be that makes me more happy.May be because I was not expecting it to be converted. More about the interview below.

Venue: IIFT, Delhi

Date:March 24th, 2010

First the GD :-

Topic: Every Child should have a bank account.

Was the third or the fourth to speak in a group of 10 or 11. While the others had accepted the topic and were discussing how to bring it forth , I started to question the topic itself, whether it is required or not ( with an example of a mother selling her new born daughter for Rs. 10 in Orissa ). Then discussed about the funding , the money , who's initiative it should be, transparency and accountability in the whole process , tried to draw an analogy and contrast with Qatar where there is such a scheme. I did not come up with other meaty points because the other guys were busy discussing that.

When I look back I guess trying to make one's identity is quite important. Try to be different , but not off-beat. And try to discuss the topic from all angles.

You must take a few mock GD's just to know how one should participate in them. Fortunately I attended 3 in a workshop , observed 2 there and participated in 2 at home.

The next was PI.

Three people : I guess 2 professors (P1 and P2) and an alumni(A) and me(I)

Salutations:

P1: Tell me about your hobbies in brief.

I: Sir , I read non-fiction and popular fiction.

P1 : Not many people read these days.Name 5 Indian fiction authors you have read.

I: ( named some 7-8 ..... recollecting them .... looking in hindsight ... I guess it came forth as being natural)

P1:These are all popular ones. But you said so.

I:(smile)

P1: non-fiction?

I: Taleb , Gladwell

P2: (interrupting) k...tell me what is so special about 371.

I: (thinking ..... P1 leaves)

P2: 3^3+7^3+1^3 = 371

I: grin.... yeah

P2: give me another number like that

I: sir can I solve some equations?

P2: here ... pen and paper...

after 10 seconds.

P2: 370 .... laugh

I: yeah ... (as if its krypton , I guess I get excited because of such situations)

P2: that is lateral thinking.

I: Bono.

(A cuts across)

A: why are you wearing a suit?

I: sir , I wanted to put my best foot forward.

A: you think we are not when we are wearing shirts?

I: (with a smile) Sir, its amongst the most important things in my life.

A: you must have taken coaching. Coaching institutes tell you to wear suits for interviews.

I: Sir , I did not take any coaching. I prepared on my own.

A: You are wearing suit. Coaching institutes tell you to wear suits. You took coaching.

I: That is hyperpolating it to a very high degree.

A: (observing the way I was sitting) Are you confident , under-confident, over-confident?

I: previously I used to be under-confident, now I find myself more confident.

A: Why these jalebi answers?Can't you be crisp?

I: I try to be as elaborate as possible to be clear.

P2: what is your percentile?

I: 99.5 . I am amongst the last people selected by IIMC for interviews.

P2: How many ahead of you?

I: Those who were selected , I don't know.

P2: How many candidates wrote the CAT>

I: 2.2 lakhs.

P2: so?

I: sir I said I did not know how many selected.

P2(smile): how do you know you were amongst the last?

I: it is there on your website sir. I searched it all up.

P2: we are done.

I: Thank you sirs. It was really a pleasure giving my first interview.

2010-02-12T00:51:00.002+05:30

Anyone played Mafia ? Werewolf?

It is an awesome game. We play that daily. About 25 developers. It gives amazing insights into game theory. The best situation that I could relate to was when the lone-wolf tried to kill the wolf-cub and how the other wolfs attacked him , making way for the villagers to lynch them!!!!

Gave a situation so much related to real life ,something which we see during the coalition politics in this country where the lone-wolf can be a candidate whose ticket is funded by a party so that this candidate can reduce the vote bank of some other party. And somehow this candidate screws up , ultimately helping the other party.

Viman told me that the game was actually an experiment in a psychological institute.

But more than that , the game gives me a platform to interact with my officemates and know them better.

I now realize how distant the academic course curriculum is from the industry requirement.

I wish we had a course in web development , I wish I had done the HTML scripting during Effervescence. And yes , get your hands dirty.

If some of my juniors read this , learn some web technology and yeah at least do your HTML well. It will give you a jump start.I wish I would have listened to my mind some 2 years ago.

Bhavin is one heck of a cool guy. Which CEO is in his office in three-fourths and a T. I saw him wearing that!

Buzz is the next word?

first day@directi

2010-02-02T22:20:00.002+05:30

Boy! job is ... k, i have been told to evaluate everything for sometime , so i won't give my judgments but well .... given a desktop with 2 screens ! they are something like 2 19" readers! that's something that i have found , well , amusing.
It is not much different from the college environment , something like we have when some project is there and a brainstorming session has to be done! It is quite free.
i have been told quite a number of times not to call people sir and madams. well 4 years in an engineering college trains you to be so , I now need to come out of that groove.
there are lots of girls , for an engineering college guy , who had 15 non-males in his batch of some 180 odd students , that is like paradise ! i don't know why i am remembering the paradise that "akhmed the deadly terrorist" on youtube wanted to go to , i hope it does not turn out that way ;)
the best part is nothing is banned over here , the environment is so that anyone does not abuse the bandwidth.
there was quite a glitch the evening before we(yanu , another intern from my college) and I landed . there was only one room in the guest house , and from what she and I comprehended of the hindi that the frontdesk guy was speaking , he wanted us to put up in the same room for the night. that was well quite a shocker! anyhow , for all those college mates who would take sadistic pleasure in imagining the same , well , she slept that night in another hotel altogether. but well that was quite humorous nevertheless.
inductions , as all the presentations , are boring , no matter it is from a good-looking lady or a pot-bellied professor.
lunch and dinner are from TajStats , its a subsidiary of the TAJ , lunch costs 30 bucks. it has both , indian and green cuisines ( the word for that is not striking me). My fruits requirement is served.
Coffee seriously is rejuvenatory. I had that today(my second day and well , have been feeling good since then). there are some 6 varieties of tea. I will try them out with due course of time.
the first thing that my team did play werewolf. not my team , but well who all were willing. it's a fun game. yanu apparently has a liking for it , wanted to go for it even today. we did , spent some 2 hours on the 7th floor of the office. It is fun seeing people lie.
oh! i almost forgot , juice is free, and amul products and some other stuff which i have not tried out till now .
the TT table is always occupied. For a guy who can never make the ball land on the table , and who ends up playing badminton there , well I cannot show my skills in public. I am still trying to find out a time in which that could be possible.
It is really fun hearing sockets and pipes and kernels and loads of other technical nitty-gritties being just puffed up at random from places.
There is a lot of things to be learnt. i wish i would have listened to my mind and been proficient in web technologies. I would like to be in some time.
the most shocking thing of mumbai is the size of a green patch that they call a park . I mean a kitchen garden can be bigger than that.
it is nice to see the local trains cross each other from the other side of the glass . thankfully it is sound proof.
have to find a place for myself. I want it closeby so that I do not have to travel in the mumbai traffic.I want it to have like a real park. I guess i am asking for a little too much.

2010-01-29T16:26:00.003+05:30

From next Monday , I would be working ; it seems strange , how would I be able to sit in one place for so long . 30 minutes and I need to leave my seat. Dad tells me that I would now have to get a bit trained.

The reputation that Directi has created this year round around the campus' is formidable . I need to learn technologies , like real fast. I hope I would be able to do that.

Right now , I have just started practicing CS again . They said Friday nights are gaming nights :)

Being involved in the placement committee for like more than 1 and a half years was a very enriching experience.The 6 of us were a tight team , or so I presume. It gives you a newer perspective on things , making some 80 calls in 2 hours , working your ass off . One of the HR people told me indeed to rest , I was walking as if someone had poked me from behind. It really seemed like that.

This was this Ms. R of one of the companies. Real Bitch! One has to be thick skinned with such people. I don't know from where had she got an MBA degree , could not manage even clerical work.

I want to document this stuff somewhere . The reason is that you always get books referring to the Ivy league colleges' placements and how to go about it. Not for places like mine , where sometimes , we literally had to compromise on our ethics and morals , and give many slot zeroes.

We have actually made a suite of software tools for mass mailing , database management and contact acquisitions that someday , you may see in the open source domain , or we may just forget that ... anyhow.

I am thankful to my MBA prep that sandpapered my rusty brain . One should not leave putting it to task , better oil it regularly.

Hostel has ended . Good news is that most of my friends made it to the best places. As we put it , it's not always about your grades , though maintain them , some of my friends were not able to make the short lists because of them. Damn grades!

Hostel has ended . How I wish there was a rewind button ; the way I enjoyed my last 6 months , had I enjoyed these 3.5 years like that. And yet I would have been at these very emotional crossroads.

There are new times and new things to come .

Why this abrupt pause in the thinking?

Placement Preperation ;)

2010-01-16T01:58:00.000+05:30

What comes out of boredom.......

Caress me , when I go still

carry me , when my legs do not have the will

Hold me , when I am about to fall

When I feel weak , be my wall

Kiss me, when I need the warmth

Right me , when I wrong

Guide me , when I fail to see the light,

When I do shiver , hold me tight.

I see you here in every line

I am so proud that you are mine.

You make me feel like the morning dew

I am sure , I love you.

\m/

2010-01-08T18:12:00.001+05:30

\m/

To a new beginning....

The unconcious

2009-11-08T11:36:00.002+05:30

A symphony of thoughts plays in my head , with the sounds sometimes deafening , sometimes making me feel numb ,sometimes rejoicing.

These thoughts are but dots , scattered randomly on the parchment , of the network in my brain , with pulses being visual traction of the quill.

Connecting the dots is all people say is to life , like an onion - peel after peel , they reveal themselves , like the stars in the sky.

You might miss them some day , the sky may be cloudy , but they will be shimmering all the way through , serene and calm with their energy only known to them.

The sages and the saints lead a life dedicated to them ,aren't they astronomers and astrologers too , and no matter how hard we try to escape it , but aren't we them in our own righteous ways?

Trying to interpret them , whatever they are ; stars , thoughts , sounds, visuals , symphonies.

The uncouncious.

Why Geeks?

2009-10-26T00:50:00.003+05:30

I don't know why some people take Linux as a crusade against Microsoft , why can't they just appreciate if Microsoft , after a decade , comes up with some decent technology?

See the comments in the following article for further details

http://www.engadget.com/2009/10/23/linus-torvalds-gives-windows-7-a-big-thumbs-up/

PS: Linus Trovalds is the creater of Linux.

Diwali thoughts

2009-10-18T21:41:00.002+05:30

How perceptions have changed. Only a decade ago , the number of crackers burst on Diwali were directly propotional to the prosperity of a person.
Today , that number is propotional to your height of ignorance.
My area saw a significant reduction on the number of crackers burst this year. Recession? May be.
But I would look that in the light of environmental conciousness of the people.
For me , it were the horrendous memories of this summer and the long delayed monsoons , and its effects on the agricultural economy , that haunted me .

gung-ho

2009-10-15T22:15:00.003+05:30

Today , after talking to a friend , I feel optimistic . Or it may be the effect of the Diwali Lightings that I see around . Any which way , I am sure that one of the biggest reasons for it being so is the confusion that I see around my generation . It was so even in my elder sister's ( I do not remember about the eldest's) , but at last we have started questioning ourselves palpably.

The confusion is an indicator to us started thinking aloud. About our future , about our knowledge base , about our information , about our work and about our lives at large. I feel that this has been made possible by the 'India shining' phenomina in the past five years , which , has been proved by the recent bout of global recession having no pre-dominant effect on India compared to the rest of the world.

This confidence indulges us in thinking out-of-the-box. It gives us the strength to remove the shackles of , as I would say , 'the middle class' mentality viz-a-viz a degree implies a job implies finding a good match implies ....implies.

People brand us being impatient and unfocussed. I would rephrase that to take things 'just-in-time'.

Students dropping out of college , sometimes even in their final year , some opting out of placements that would come with a stinkingly fat paycheck , forces me to think of an Indian Bill Gates or Steve Jobs in the making.

We have overcome the initial inertia for thinking , for innovating. The momentum needs to be maintained.

Would an egalitarian society remove this disparity and make us all equals , in terms of independance or would it shackle the elite and the priveleged , as in the above context?

Seeing into the history of India from the 70's to the late 80's , I find the above to be impossible the socialistic way.

Though our vision would be a free society , the above can only be achieved by having a society where nothing comes free. Teenagers coming to the metros from the villages of Bihar , Jharkhand , Karnataka , Tamil Nadu and making it big , have been able to do so , only because of the fire which was kindled by the age old disparities in their hometowns. Not that I would like that happening , but it is the biggest incentive.

The dreams have been percolated down to them , in some cases by observing these teenagers, an osmosis has occured into the higher and privelaged classes.

Any which way , the spirit is high and till the time this euphoric society of all being equal is not achieved , which I find impossible to be so in every letter and in every word , the above metamorphosis is bound to continue.

The only problem that could arise can be in the form of the '77 emergency that Mrs. Gandhi had imposed on the youth of then , curtailing them of their fundamental right , the right to freedom.

The government should focus on just the law and order to be mantained. The rest , we are confident , we can very well manage.

Problem with Pidgin

2009-10-08T03:14:00.002+05:30

Disclaimer : This post totally highlights the problems that one could face while installing the pidgin music tracker plugin . All the events described are fictitious.

Pidgin is a chatting client that comes pre-installed in Ubuntu( it comes for windows platform as well). I recommend it because of its proxy support and the various protocols that it supports. I use it for IRC , which is a wonderful resource for geeks. XChat on unix or MIrc on Windows are other clients for the same with more functionalities.
This is a warning for all those who use pidgin . "BE careful if you use the music tracker plugin". Music tracker, as the name suggests , should set as your status message the current track that is being played in your music player.
Now, in Gtalk , the plugin like the above only sets the name of an mp3 being played in your media player as your status message.
Music tracker is evil on that front.
I only got to realize that when at 3:15 am , I recieved a burst of chats , each with either a 'lol' , 'haha' , 'mazze' .... and some being a lot bold with ' apna haath. .....'
One of them was kind enough to tell me that my status message was ' extreme pe**tra**ons'.
Well ... the next time you use pidgin , either do not use musictracker or configure it properly.
It even sets the name of the videos being played in your media player as your status message , to embarass you.

Frustation

2009-09-24T03:31:00.002+05:30

Downloading stuff for the semester project from the internet can become morassing sometimes.

It has been 3 hours writing the script for downloading the csvs from the nse website , scratching my head over why 2009 comes out as 3909 , only to know that the developers of the java Date class , for no logical reason that can come to my head right now , started recording years in excess of 1900. The class is deprecated all right , but this?

The online forum that gave me the above idea , ridiculed me for not seeing the warning messages generated.

Do Indians really care about warnings?

And why my work was wasted?

When the script was ready , I got to know that the URLs generated are not following a pattern.

How random can the NSE website get in storing their content?

BSE India , at least for it's online content is way better managed.

A total waste of 3 hours.

tragiComedy

2009-08-31T18:07:00.003+05:30

Recession was just a stranger to me till now. Today I met it in person , and even though it haunted me while the afternoon siesta, I still find myself optimistic while writing this post ( may be the reality has not just sunk in).

I called up some 10 HR people of various companies , and some would not believe it , I could not talk to even one of them , on my first call. It was lunch time alright , but well , does one ignore a call on ones personal mobile number?

Even the number from which I was calling is so easy to remember that it seems like a corporate number. Still?

Well , though I got a treble call backs. With each one of them informing me that they are on a hiring freeze. No problems , who says we want immediate recruitments ? We are aiming for Jan 2010 , that's like a few corporate light years away.

One of the companies told me that they would first place my seniors , then our chance would come . Fair enough.

One of the guys called company A , pursued it , and things looked very optimistic. Only to know that the HR person had changed the firm, and we were talking about some other company? When the HR person realized that , he fired us left and right.

A few calls would be put forth to pacify him. His new company is even better a brand [;)].

One guy called company C , started talking in Telugu , for 10 minutes , only to inform us that it wasn't company C , rather a bar in Hyderabad.

Company D , even though we were sure of the authenticity of the phone number , would tell us that it was a wrong number . Well what about basic courtesy company D?

Recession has taken its toll. Some of the people around me have been telling me that. Seniors told me that the conversion ratio of bringing the companies to the campus to the companies contacted is a menial 5% , that too in the good times . Those were some things I could not understand.

That truth .... somehow seems to sink in now!

A new direction

2009-08-27T03:23:00.003+05:30

Finally I have some answers to do the question asked cursorily in the previous post."Why should someone recruit us"? Today , while discussing the same question in reference to the financial , banking , investment and consulting firms , I, though quite slickly , only to keep the spirits of my fellow mates up with regards to placement ( and which gives me a sense of reassurance myself) , answered them with we having an exposure which no matter how hard a private institute tries to give to its students , would never even come close. Being in a government college , and that too of national level , the students of IIITA know the emerging markets , their need , the psychology of the people , their mores , their inhibitions , their secret pride , their understanding of things better than the rest of our peers.
We are well versed with the government machinery , the policies which it tries to push in the name of social welfare and what makes it click in that organization. The huge investment to the tune of 10 thousand crores announced by the Congress government , and the project hence which would be given out to these companies , would require them naturally to look for the aforementioned traits.
The diversity , which IIITA offers through admissions through the AIEEE examination makes us know India better than the rest.
It seems hypocrisy , the very things I condemn seem like something which could work to our advantage.
Hypocrisy or no hypocrisy , the above makes me smug , temporarily.
I think , I am learning the ways of this world , is this what people called maturity?
These apprehensions.

Random

2009-08-17T17:24:00.002+05:30

Things have not been going on at the same pace as they should have been , I sometimes feel there is paucity of time , that has never been so , even during dire situations during exams. That is something new for me.
It was kind of some of my friends to tell me that I have forgotten everything of the past. I acknowledge that , I do not remember what I was three years ago , even two , it seems I have awoken after a long slumber , may be I have gone into one.
Though I wish I hadn't forgotten my quantitative skills , which unfortunately has been .
I was going into the 'phase' , which some people glorify , some condemn , but this time it could not acquaintance rape me off my self-esteem , self-pride , and whatever pompous words people use to define themselves. May be it was because of the paucity of time , may be because of me growing into a stoic ( which makes me wonder ) , may be .
I would never like to acknowledge to have lost the above characteristics and so would not write further on it.
Which brings me to a question which has been forcing me to think a lot recently. If someone asks me why they should hire me , and I tell them a few things that I could do , and if they append an "and" to it , what should be my answer ? For I do not see something overtly exceptional that I can do , something which not many in this world might be able to do.
While typing this , I reminisce a shot from the movie 'Pursuit of Happyness' when Will Smith goes into the interview room and is asked about his grades and to which he replies something like ' If I do not know anything , I will say I do not know , but I will find it how to do it , and I'll do it'.
Well cannot anything like the above be done by a sophomore who has access to Google? What is so special in that?
Well , may be I am reading too much into abstract , may be the Pareto Principle of the 80-20 follows up here , may be ignorance is indeed bliss. May be?
Yesterday while talking to one of my friends ,I was a fervent advocate for living a life for passion , and yet right now I am not totally convinced myself , but I find myself more and more accepting the idea in the above lines.
Day before yesterday was India's 62nd Independence Day , and my dad was not at all happy to know I did not go for the flag hoisting. In this clime of aggrandizing a leader who has canvassed herself to the top on account of her caste , where she is wasting away my dad's taxes on her larger than life statues , where freedom to education and competition of some has been compromised on an excuse of social inclusion and welfare , well not many would have envisioned a free India of such sorts. If Salman Rushdie writes another book on the lines Midnight's children about the present scenario , he would write about a man sitting in a hostel of Allahabad hallucinating ways in which the country would be free of parasites and leeches of the country.

I heard to Bob Marley today. His songs have some great lyrics. I think I like reggae.
Enough of this random rant.

The Transformers

2009-08-02T10:04:00.002+05:30

It has been 3 years since the beginning of this college and hostel journey. But never have such turns been experienced.
Being a premier institute in IT insures us of uninterrupted power supply.
That is the only insurance that has not been backed out on.
The network is down in the boys hostels , most often. People console themselves with that being a step by the authorities to make us attend classes . The reality seems otherwise.
Twice in this week , there was no water in the loos , I had to use water from the water cooler.
Yesterday itself , water stopped coming from the shower when I was bathing , I had to , again seek rescue from the water cooler. I cannot comment much except that it was ' way -way cool '.

The water problems are not the institute's fault , rather it is a side effect of global warming . This and the refusal of the rain Gods to show mercy on parched lips and broken earth this summer makes me panicky for the need of immediate and adequate steps to be taken , even if the motive be as selfish as survival for me.
The infrastructure that I once boasted about my campus seems to have vanished in the recent months . The major transformations point to only a couple reasons .
Firstly , according to the directives of the central government on reservation, the number of students enrolled for a course have gone up by 20% , which now comprises an additional 400 student population.

The planning and the network infrastructure has fallen short of satiating the need of 1500 students . This might be a result of the administration which simply ignores the needs of the hostels. A network which was designed to serve the needs of 500 students when the institute was conceived simply is overburdened with the deficient infrastructure of only 1 router for 3 hostels. One has to brute force for an IP for an hour to get connected.
The government has been cavalier in its attitude towards quality education , for pleasing its vote bank it seems to have forgotten that only excellence would remedy development , which it blames to be the bottleneck in every issue.
Yesterday , no matter how frivolous we were , the main reason we could identify for we being attractive for placements was us being 'sasta' and 'bikao' , which I see as a manifestation of the maldirections being given to us.
It seems that , especially in the case of government institutes, that we are on the course so vividly depicted in the epic Atlas Shrugged.
IIITA was visioned as an institute of excellence , clearly we have lost that vision , in the murky fog of reservation , social altruism of the government , insufficient planning , and most of all , a compromise on quality education.

Harbinger

2009-06-10T17:19:00.004+05:30

Here I would be discussing about the computer requirements of the hoi polloi (and not the ones who require special computing power to earn their money) of India.

Seeing the recent development like Waves, Docs and Skydrive , with previous advancements of streaming music and videos and blogging , the research has rightly been directed to the direction of future needs ( and which I think a person spending 12 hours daily in front of the computer would have realized himself.)

The news of a computer coming with an OS sans everything but an internet interface might seem to be quite a bold step , but vivisecting my daily routine , I could not agree more.

The browser seems to be the only process which runs on my system ( and we all know how pathetic we feel to get our PCs slowed down by the background processes of the anti virus and the updates , even the names of which are so difficult to decrypt.)

Seeing the IO presentation of the Google Waves , I see the new protocols transforming not only the internet business but in particular the OS business.
Anti virus companies now should move on from launching stale products for the PCs to server firewalls which are intelligent enough not to require any PC anti virus.
The only reason why Acrobat seemed convincing to me was for its markup and comment tools. With the incorporation of the same in Google Reader, I guess my need for it is satiated there itself.
For mp3s and videos , Youtube seems to be a great resource. I don't mind seeing a video in the flv format , Indian standards for entertainment , to the dissapointment for the makers of Blu-Ray , are not quite high ( which conforms to the rampart piracy in this part of the world.)
Internet and the browser is a necessity for the orkutters and the facebookers and the tweeters , which itself takes a large chunk of our time ( and still we do not see the community cult blooming in India).
For the office products for which Microsoft drains some $700 out of the pocket , Google Docs is a ready replacement.
Thus , in the future , we might see some hardware company( and a complany for profit) making computers which have only an internet interface , nothing more , selling laptops for less than a $100 , which still is a dream.
The requirement thus is to have the storage capacity for the huge digital footprint , which is growing like a monster everyday. Put your money into NetApps and EMC dear investors.
On the social front , production of the above kinds of laptops would mean a low power consuming device, which inturn would mean lesser of environmental sins commited.
What is required is higher, denser,faster connectivity of regions. With the telecom sector having already spread its coverage , not much of infrastructure would be required for bandwidth requirements.
I wish to see the days in near future of India where internet would be as cheap as that in the US.

Why Atlas Shrugged

2009-06-05T15:39:00.004+05:30

Reading the communist manifesto today a week after finishing Atlas Shrugged makes me realize the antagonism that is present between the two philosophies. It seems that Ms. Rand has put in her literature ( which I find highly repetitive after reading atlas shrugged , fountain head and a couple of her essay compilations) what a free thinker should be like. While the bourgeoisie are looked with contempt in communism , it is the same class of people which are celebrated in objectivism.
The romanticism in this novel gives a sense of belonging to the reader where , seeing the fate of communism in the world , is what seems to be the righteous path.
The strong style of writing transforms the reader to the world of the 20s and the 30s where communism was in the rise the world over.
In her reply to Marx and Engels , Ms Rand in the same tone , evangelizes pragmatism and a society which provides for the American pursuit of happiness.
She argues the rectitudinous in selfishness and greed ( which I would like to refer to as the basic instinct of man) , which in the today's competitive world more so, seems to be a morality in itself , much too different from the times when collectivism was considered to be righteous , which might be understood to be , in those times , in the words of Marx , Reactionism by the proletarians against the naked oppression and exploitation by the bourgeious.
It might be hard to grasp people rejoicing smoking a ciggerate , but nonetheless the syllogism, of it supporting Man as the greatest of the minds , through which it has been able to control the once dreaded fire , behind the above argument , as has been thoroughly argued by Ms Rand in her literature should be understood.
The advent of the internet and globalization has created a society , the same as the city of the Atlantis of the Atlas shrugged. The newer generation holds firm Ms Rand's oath of " I shall not live for someone else as they shall not for me" and " Give me liberty or give me death".

In today's scenario , the role of the government should only be restricted to , in addition to the one of providing liberty , monitoring of the human rights of the people , where the greed and selfishness , not understood in terms of objectivism , by the lowest of the animals roaming this earth ,would lead to a revolution of communism , leaving the society in utter anarchy , as the times which are so horrifically and abundantly described in this epic novel.
For the rest , the greed and selfishness will lead Man to the place like Atlantis.

Bing Bang in India

2009-06-01T21:57:00.003+05:30

Microsoft has unveiled its new search engine BING , 2 days before the scheduled date.
A quick overview of the Bing gives a feel that at last Microsoft has come up with a search engine which can be a competitor to the near monopolist Google search.
The loading time of both the sites is nearly a blink.
The search results for the queries ( like shopping malls in Noida or natural language processing) , essentially are the same. MS no longer refrains from using Wikipedia as its top source of search query results , which I found was not there in the Live Search.
Bing let me down with multiple results hyper linking essentially to the same website( in the case of NLP to Wikipedia ) which does not make a lot of sense as , if I can go to a website which is textual enough for me to read , I would be intelligent enough to go to the links myself.
Where Bing scores is the added functionality given other than the basic returning of web pages , which makes it an intelligent search engine ( though not as per the capabilities of the industry like the one shown in WolframAlpha.)
The summary of the web page which can be accessed through the red dot at the side is a very novel idea , though the summary of certain web pages were disappointing. A better summarizer would make it a great feature for future search business.
Another great part of the engine is the customized search results presented. For example , shopping malls in Noida return a few places ( though personally I feel they can be among the worst search results that can be returned.)
I find the yahoo search engine to score in search query results in this domain over Bing or Google.
A feature which appeals though in Bing is the incorporation of the Live Map showing the landmarks of these places.
The related search queries at the left hand side of the window though gives better results.

The videos results have the same feature as the Ubuntu where hovering the mouse over a video plays it.
The search result for Noida in videos returns as the top result an MMS scandal of some B school , which reflects the quality of the search results returned.
Maps returns the Live map which is non-elaborative in comparison to Google maps.

People have been worried over Bing being a search engine which is able to decide for itself as to what kind of search results should be returned in comparison to Google giving all the search results possible. When seeing the current power of this engine to take decisions , it seems a non-decision approach would be a better idea for places such as India where data related to a particular city is not ample to take the decisions.But the potential is immense in having a search engine which is capable of taking intelligent search engines , like the Wolfram Alpha search engine.
Microsoft should , as opposed to limited spending proposed by Steve Balmer , invest more into Bing , to increase its market share from 2-3% presently , to something respectable to become a true competitor of Google in the search business.

The polythene bag

2009-05-27T00:55:00.003+05:30

It rained here yesterday night. We were playing cricket.
In the white light from the florescent lamps mounted high up , with the background of the pitch black sky and the slanted drizzle in the wind , I saw a white polythene bag floating by.
High above the rest of its type on the road , it was as if it was flying , enjoying the wind , gliding in it like a seagull , careless and free , brave enough to have left the security of its company , kissing every raindrop which fell on it , and which shimmered on its body in the white light.

But there was something missing , and it was the control it should have had over itself.
Yet, till the time it was in my sight ,it was so beautiful.

The life of a Eunuch

2009-05-22T16:29:00.000+05:30

My name is Chandni. I am 25. I was born a boy , I was discovered a eunuch.
My father is a professor at a degree college in Lakheempur , Uttar Pradesh.
I was the first baby of our house. I was 11 and in the 7th standard of the Kendriya Vidyalaya, when I was left in the streets of Delhi by my father.
A police report was filed in the Lakheempur police station about me going missing. It is still open.

I begged for 3 years at the Canought Place inner circle with a group of beggars. Then my appearance gave away my sexuality. I was ridiculed of my being , of my existence by the fellow beggars. They teased me by clapping their hands in front of my face. Some even kicked my genitals. Then , one day they told me to get lost with my 'kind' of people.

I went to Rajghat , to beg. Nobody gave me alms. They stared at my face , as if I was some alien. The women with their children would scamper away when I asked them for some left-over food.
They did not even let me touch their feet. They thought 'it' might be contagious.
I used to cry at night about the sins I would have commited in my past life and the punishment God had given me.
The 500 rupees that I had saved in the past 3 years were about to be finished when the Rajghat group of eunuchs came to my rescue.
They were traveling in the Ambassador when they spotted me there.
The head of the group was Rajni. She took me to a building in the Mandavali area. I did not like Rajni , nor Shanno or Chameli. I was told to learn it from Rajni , the way to dance , to clap , to play the Dholak.
I was even told the way to fend off the ones who 'acted smart' , all the rebukes.
I did not like it. Initially , I was even reluctant to do it. Then one day when I was travelling alone in a local train , the whole compartment shooed me away. Ladies raised their voices. Children cried.3 men came and one of them spit on my feet. That day I rebuked as bad as I could , till the time I could get down at the next station. That evening I cried.
From the next day on , I was a eunuch.
My first independant assignment was on the occasion of house warming. I was 22 then. I started negotiating at 5000 rupees , it came down to 500. I am a poor bargainer. I give into emotions of the old, their eyes seem too innocent. I do not like dealing with 'housewifes', most of them. They make a ruckus about us blessing them , they treat us like filth. I do not understand , when both the Pandit and we are blessing them , in our own ways; well , ours is more physical but that is altogether a different issue. I like doing the rituals with ata and haldi and chawal. It gives me a sense of purity , like I was the same Pandit , like I was also deserving of the same importance and reverence as him.I wish people showed us the same obiesance as him.I wish we too had a cornshell and people would fold their hands in respect , and we would tie the thread in their hands , and they would touch our feet. Ha! romanticism.
In reality , even a genuine smile is what sometimes I crave for.

Hostel Cricket

2009-05-20T04:59:00.002+05:30

It is 5 in the morning .
And it has been 4 hours since I have been playing cricket with all the guys who have stayed back in the summer holidays in the hostel.
Love to have started playing again, after nearly 3 years.
And would like to keep this memory forever , the whole 'bakar' game that is played , and where teams seem to be at war , where some are identified for ' uski to bajaani hi hai' , where sometimes the scrotum of the other team players are the target , where , ma- bhen derivatives know no bounds , where sledging happens intra as well as inter-team , where the sound of the bat connecting to the ball is better than any sweet music , where a 4 or a 6 is celebrated by showing gestures which would never be shown in a social gathering , where we can transform into 10 year olds quarreling about a boundary , a wide or even the rules that apply to the game , where a game finishes every 10 minutes and a new star batsmen or bowler emerges for each.

The heat is a deterrent for us in the day , the humidity is the reason for us cribbing to go home , but when it is cricket , we don't even care , whether after an hour of play , even our vests are to be taken off.

Only when the birds start chirping and when the first rays of the sun can be seen destroying the darkness around , giving a heavenly bluish tinge to the sky , do we call our game off.

The public's verdict

2009-05-17T01:31:00.002+05:30

16 th May would always be a milestone in the indian politics. The verdict of the people is conspicuously clear , we no more can tolerate a government made of goons (of the RJD), a polity of nonsecular ( yes , which makes more sense after one of my friends told me the three 'basic' issues addressed by the BJP) people or representatives who brand themselves on the basis of caste ( with special reference to Mr. Pasvan).

Seeing the mandate , it is clear that the public still wants grass root politics , where candidates go to their villages and ask their problems ( as Rahul Gandhi did in UP) , not pompous advertising on every website you visit ( the campaign showing Advani humped ; which I got to know was even there on some porn sites) or someone who sits on the seat of power as if a queen ( and then calls herself 'dalit ki beti').

Mr Lone loosing his debut election shows that even the awam of Kashmir does not want seperatist leaders( considering a majority of people voting).

It is a landmark election , where at last , after some 15 years we would have a stable and independant government.

Looking = Eveteasing

2009-05-15T01:37:00.003+05:30

Attached is a snapshot from the blank noise project .
15% of the people who have voted here think that looking , yes , looking is a way of eve teasing.
Well , I agree staring is , but looking?

And , for me the most surprising part is that 15% people also voted that , other than the ways of eve teasing in the list here, there are other ways of eve teasing as well. How can people think of so many ways!

Languages

2009-05-03T23:52:00.002+05:30

And suddenly I want to learn Bengali for reading Tagore , Latin for Dante and Sanskrit for The Gita.

Polls 1

2009-04-19T08:26:00.014+05:30

I want to see a national debate between the prime ministerial candidates. For once , something which would have a direct impact on the middle class , instigating them to vote , and that too for the right people.
Yesterday, one of my batchmates forwarded me BJP's IT vision.

I have never read a manifesto as such. But , seeing this, I think , being overtly optimistic about it's implementation , BJP with such points could bring in the digital revolution.
But then, the points specified are so generic that they can be the summary of a GD that takes place on Sundays.
Also, the implementation details are missing. It's something like their erstwhile India Shining , where a rosy picture is being painted, but which is far away from reality.
For example, how in 3 years can they give a national identity device to every citizen of India, when we do not even have a total count of Indian citizens?
Also, once this identity is with every citizen , won't the militant forces have a free access to get this identity of being an Indian citizen.
The country cannot afford to give a billion of identification devices which would be tamper proof.
This seems , on a cursory analysis to be , if implemented , something like the dotcom bust.
Mr. Advani , it would be better if this vision of yours could be tranformed from 'in your dreams' to something realistic.
But I like the idea of all the post offices being given broadband access ( well I feel even a dial-up would be just fine, considering the length and breadth of our nation).
Post offices can serve the dual porpose of being a place for the snail communication and the e-communication.
Advani's IT vision.

The presentation culture

2009-04-01T20:40:00.001+05:30

It has been nearly three years since I started my bachelors.
And no matter how much I have been trying to avert the presentation culture which is pervasive in each of my semester, it seems that I am at last accepting it as a necessity to accustom myself to this way of teaching.
But I still have my doubts.

I cannot have the patience nor the tolerance to just let go any piece of information that might be necessary.Nor the ignorance or the co-relating ability , whichever way it might be comprehended , to understand the material in the presentation.
The authors of the books are not crazy to write reams of papers with nothing significant in them , not like in some of the answer scripts which some of my batchmates and even a few of my lecturers urge us to do.

Do presentations save time?
I think if one wants a clearer picture, a book is needed , and a clearer picture is what one should strive for.

I think this very presentation culture is in some way responsible for the economic crisis that the world is seeing these days.
Everything was in the form of the high level presentations, the presentors in no way wanted to present the bad-grade mortage debts.
The high level just talked about the AAA securities which they had been cast into.
The managerial fraternity , which has been groomed on this ' presentation culture' were only interested in the high level presentations, forgetting about what actually constituted the AAA securities.
The presentors were paid hefty sums , so were the ones who were presented the slide-shows , either for them turning a blind eye or else for them accustoming themselves to the presentation culture.

If the presentation culture has such consequences that countries could go bankrupt , that people are stripped off their security,stability and peace of mind , I am sorry but I refuse the presentation culture to pollute me.

A grade lost here or there for my incompetence of finishing off with the course ,well I could manage that.

Polls

2009-03-16T13:00:00.002+05:30

Around 70% sites that I am visiting are full of the 'LK Advani for PM' advertisement.

It is actually a great step forward by the NDA to address the indian netizens for the polls.

I wonder how many Indians do actually have access to the internet and the luxury to idle away their time and money on sites like youtube.

The color combination of the advertisement is quite catchy and poll-oriented.

Also , can this media , for the Indians described above , be effective in garnering votes for the NDA.

What was surprising was that on youtube , the same ad is on the videopage that has the Jai-Ho camapaign of the UPA.

And what is equally disguting about the Jai-Ho campaign are the frames in which students are shown waving their degrees as if they were just pieces of paper.

As if all those so-called welfare movements that were inititated in the quinquenial period were just a political gimmick and for the sake of education being a few pieces of paper to be waved.

Quizzes

2009-03-06T01:44:00.002+05:30

What beer cannot do , where cough-syrups falter , only quizzes are sucessful.

I was thinking of posting something on my demonic lifestyle , sleeping at 7 in the morning and always asking my roommate for a proxy in the morning session.

But today , its not even 2 and iam sleepy.

Tomorrow is my Image Processing quiz and I am already dozing off.

Quizzes should be taken more often.

Revival .. and more

2009-02-10T22:14:00.005+05:30

The cook in me has resurrected from its ashes.

Most of my time spent in the room other than sleeping , is eating.

And the pleasure one gets by cooking for himself , is quite smugging.

I make soup , noodles , soup and noodles , cheese-balls and noodles , and whatever which actually does not require any skill , but nevertheless.... But , judging the amount of water to put in is an art , my roommate critics me about.

And so I have found a new friend in the electric kettle that I had bought some one and a half years ago but realized its worth just a few days back.

The last time Dua and I( and well Manish and Crash) went to BigBazaar, we squeeked like hell on discounts and special offers.

The glow on Dua's face when he spotted 25% off on Maggi Tomato soup , was very much noticeable.

And the way he went on bragging about it to Manish and Crash , well I can't find sufficient adjectives to describe that.

Sometimes I think we are becoming the typical housewives they potray in those K-serials. We like to gossip. I want to describe it as 'bitching around' , roadies has made that word popular, but I think we don't have those many beeps to support us , nor those arguments .

We wait for Saturdays to download Roadies , wake whole Monday night to download Heroes for Tuesday , and garnish the other days with an episode or two of numb3rs or a movie everyday.

Manish and I cleaned our room just yesterday. Till now , according to my survey , we have managed to clinch the title of ' the dirtiest room inhabitants ' , with 5 and a half months of straight 'not-even-brooming' policy , but the competition was strong. At last somewhere we are first. Go Manish!

I am waiting like a maniac for DevD. It's not in Allahabad and also because our downloaders have failed IIITA. They could not find a single link on the internet from where they could get a pirated copy. I guess that is because the movie might not have been released in Pakistan.

Placements seem to be grim. I came out with a business plan for movie producers on an efficient way to curb piracy , till the time they are ready to give us a free copy for IIITA. We will direct out downloaders group to report every website , torrent site , where they find a pirated copy. Imagine 300 students on an active watch-out. Nobody could beat our system. IIITA downloaders come just behind the Russians and the Chinese in downloading pirated material. We could rake in money folks. UTV pictures, give us a copy of DevD , and we would ensure no piracy .

Someone give me DevD download links please.

Cellophane

2009-01-16T23:23:00.004+05:30

I want to be like cellophane
wrap you around in my arms
like cellophane
shielding from the disturbances outside
like cellophane
pecking you on your lips
like cellophane
showing you the world through my eyes
like cellophane
being transparent and full of colors
like cellophane
being complementary to your beauty
like cellophane
without you which my existence is no more

Slumdog millionare

2009-01-15T21:24:00.002+05:30

Amazing movie. Worth each second seen.

The railways

2009-01-06T14:30:00.002+05:30

Prayag Raj Express,the best train in India , these days:
Journey time : 9 hours
Late by :10 hours
To make it worse : no food
Results : A headache for 2 days
Though the adventure of escaping the late-fee penalty was something to remember.

Sounds

2008-12-16T11:20:00.002+05:30

Well , most of my acquaintances find it irritating. Sometime ago even I did.
But now , I just love that sound. The one that plays in the railway station before each announcement.
How do I put it down here?
It reminds me of the excitement of going back home.
And while returning to the college , may be I am too pre-occupied to bother with it.
5 more days to enjoy it again.

What shook me

2008-12-03T00:47:00.002+05:30

It's been 6 days now after the attack.
But I was numbed by what my sister told me today.
2 sisters. One of them my sister's friend.
Sister 1 and sister 2.
Both on the phone , talking.
sister 2 in the Taj , trapped. She has closed her door , hid herself under the bed.
Sister 1 asks about her safety. Sister 2 tells about her situation.
Suddenly , there is a banging at her door.
She panics , Sister 1 panics.
They are the terrorists.
But she does not move.
They talk on the phone in a hush-hush.
After 2 minutes they break down the door. They stop talking.
She keeps silent.
The terrorists search around.
No one.
They turn.
Sister 2 whispers to her sister , "Gone , I am safe."
Silence.
At the door, they turn , detonate a grenade , slam the door.
Silence.
Serenely ,Sister 2 to Sister 1 -" They have dropped a grenade. This is a final goodbye."
An explosion.
Silence.
The silence prevails

Exam Time

2008-11-24T03:36:00.001+05:30

Exams start in 2 days.
And so I have started to watch a season of Seinfeld , most of it a repetition.
Distracted.
So much so that I cannot even enjoy what I am watching.

How to fill your stomach

2008-11-14T23:07:00.004+05:30

I went to the mess today and actually learnt a very important lesson.
I learnt that hope and mix and match are the two most essential things to fill one's stomach.
Hope , that the mess food would be good , which never turns out to be so.
Mix n match is what Bhalgat taught me.
He took roti + vegetable.
Had eaten half the roti ,when he decided he could not take it anymore.
then roti + dal .
half roti again , then the same thing .
Then he hoped that rice would be better.
He ate 4 spoon full with dal and even that didn't turn up fine.
4 spoon fulls with vegetable(yes , vegetable and rice), left it to it after that.
He then tried only dal.
2 spoon fulls and same conclusion.
Vegetables , same.
and the rasgulla.
and he was done.
Malik dhaba will serve him in the night.
I had to go at that very instant.
Bhalgat's smart.
Why am I so damn distracted that even this gets its place here.

How distracted

2008-11-14T22:58:00.003+05:30

I have sat down to study for like 4 times ( and I bet that number for me is worth considering to be a big number in this context.)
And I don't know what , but I am so much distracted that I end up reading the news , or surfing facebook , or writing a new post or what all and what not.
How disgusting it feels to be so damn distracted.
And Karunesh sounds good.
Arghh!!

Sundaes + Labels

2008-11-13T21:54:00.003+05:30

What does it take to convert vanilla into a sundae?

And this is totally random.
I have noticed this for long but could not come up with a decent answer.
Why does blogger has, as example , scooters as the first label when one creates a post.
Shouldn't it be on the basis of popularity of the label or something?
Scooter is just too strange.
Something like a car or a bike would have been better an example.

Thrice and over

2008-11-10T18:10:00.002+05:30

It has been three times now that I have been heavily drunk.
And this time it seems that it was not good , at all.
Yesterday was my senior's farewell party and it feels too bad that I don't exactly remember what happened after I got drunk.
I think I am done.
And yes, I want to be the school boy I was , again.

Quotes

2008-10-26T23:34:00.001+05:30

D - " You have to be as straight as straight you can be about your sexuality. Pun intended."

A - " I can never be a pervert. I am unable to be one."

The Unforgiven 3

2008-10-21T21:03:00.001+05:30

How could he know
This new dawn's light
Would change his life forever?

Set sail to sea
But pulled off course
By the light of golden treasure

Was he the one causing pain
With his careless dreaming?
Been afraid
Always afraid
Of the things he's feeling

He could just be gone
He would just sail on
He'll just sail on

How can I be lost,
If I've got nowhere to go?
Search for seas of gold
How come it's got so cold?

How can I be lost?
In remembrance I relive
And how can I blame you
When it's me I can't forgive?

These days drift on
Inside a fog
It's thick and suffocating

His sinking life
Outside it's hell
Inside, intoxication

He's run aground
Like his life
Water much too shallow

Slipping fast
Down with his ship
Fading in the shadows

Now a castaway
They've all gone away
They've gone away

How can I be lost
If I've got nowhere to go?
Search for seas of gold
How come it's got so cold?

How can I be lost?
In remembrance I relive
And how can I blame you
When it's me I can't forgive?

Forgive me
Forgive me not
Forgive me
Forgive me not
Forgive me
Forgive me not
Forgive me
Forgive me
Why can't I forgive me?

(Solo)

Set sail to sea
But pulled off course
By the light of golden treasure

How could he know
This new dawn's light
Would change his life forever?

How can I be lost,
If I've got nowhere to go?
Search for seas of gold
How come it's got so cold?

How can I be lost?
In remembrance I relive
So how can I blame you
When it's me I can't forgive?

TWICE

2008-10-16T06:50:00.002+05:30

The second time.
But the best part is I am reset.

Height of absent-mindedness

2008-10-12T00:47:00.002+05:30

My sister works for MS and i was too terrified in seeing the share prices crashing so severely yesterday. ( they plummeted down 38%).
I started to monitor the prices hence for MS , just in the hope of things being safe.
I monitored them today as well , in the intervals of every 5 minutes.
I realized it after about 2 hours that the prices were constant ( a down of 22.5%).
Even I recall hallucinating that the prices were moving.
It took me about 2 hours to realize that they were not.
Today was Saturday , and NYSE was closed.
I am too stupid.

expectations - the movie

2008-10-11T03:11:00.004+05:30

Can our expectations be decoupled from someone else's , when it is that someone who is the actor in that expectation.
Yesterday , I failed miserably as the director of that movie.
It's like there still is the lacuna where all the communication that i thought would take place , was lost.
The actor played the part , but i could not see my reflection in the character.
What a waste.
Why the dependency?
When can we find the coherence.
When can I make a blockbuster?
The dependency still remains.
For a director never makes a movie for himself .
Or does he?
Wish he could.
And yet not.

2008-10-02T04:38:00.002+05:30

I am Vivek Bijlwan. That is my identity.
Do we really need a name for our identity?
Can't we live a life without name but not anonymous?
Like this post.

2008-09-30T20:47:00.002+05:30

The God and The Devil had , have and will always fight.
Let's do something else.

Cobwebs

2008-09-26T00:15:00.003+05:30

My room is full of cobwebs.
I like its design.
I like how the threads flow in the air of the fan.
The delicate balance that these threads maintain between the two adjoining tables.
Just like the balance that we have in our relationships , or we have to develop.
The silk shines in the tubelight.

Lesson to be learnt :: I need to clean up my room :P . It's been some months i guess.

Serial blasts

2008-09-14T02:33:00.002+05:30

today , 5 bombs ripped apart through the heart of Delhi.
20 people died.
I was touched by the people who were there at bomb sites ready to help.
Tomorrow will be another day , a new life for everyone. Not sure what happens by the evening.
I salute the spirit of Delhi.

A song dedicated to Somani

2008-09-07T19:49:00.003+05:30

Patli kamar mutka ke
Nagin se bal khake
Nain se nain ladaake
Dhani chunari sarkaake

Dilwalo ke dil ka caraar lootne
Yeh aayaa hai UP Bihar lootne
Dilwalo ke dil ka caraar lootne
Yeh aaya hai UP Bihar lootne

post ur comments::: ;-) ;-) ;- )

Celebration

2008-09-06T21:04:00.001+05:30

Celebrating ourselves.
I appreciate those who do it.
And yet can't.

The office

2008-09-03T00:56:00.002+05:30

Lately my neighbours have been asking what makes me laugh so that all of them get to know that iam laughing.

The office.
Watch it , hilarious to the core.
Michael Scott is a living Cartman.
Now can any series beat that?

My music taste these days

2008-09-03T00:51:00.002+05:30

Lately , I have been hooked on to doom metal.
I don't get what the vocalists sings most often .... but the music gives me some solace.
So, even though the readership here is just 2-3 , still if you know any band in that genre , just let me know ( i know google comes with a lot a answers , but not genuine advices).

Clarification

2008-08-31T14:07:00.003+05:30

Dear All
This is to inform all my gtalk friends who have pinged me in the last 3 days and have found me busy round the clock that it is not my busyness , self-obsession or whatever they think of me that has lead to my ill-deed of not replying but simply my carelessness to go offline on my pidgin client on a linux system ( a clarification if you wonder how i can be busy all the time with not being there. Pidgin uses some japanese server to connect to talk.google.com and hence does not support the capability ( that's what i feel is the problem) of changing the status to 'idle'. It can also be a problem of pidgin as it might be continuously refreshing the connection in the background. That's what i can think of at present.)

And yes , I am no freak to be studying at 5 in the morning.

Thanking you
Yours faithfully

Advice

2008-08-31T11:58:00.002+05:30

I was obsessed to make myself confused big time by thinking and thinking and thinking daily about it. And then :::
" Dude! You are there to study and for a career.
Not for experimenting with emotions . Grow up."

How nicely can 2 lines bring everything into perspective.

Phenomena

2008-08-31T11:44:00.003+05:30

We know what they say is right , no matter how harsh it may be.
Coming from them its naked.
And yet we do not want to acknowledge it's nakedness , it may be laced with some exaggeration, something intentionally put-in.
Let us at least acknowledge them as our parents.
Let's name the phenomenon FAMILY.

Closed eyes.

2008-08-30T22:43:00.002+05:30

It's sometimes better to shut your eyes , specially when you cannot come to a conclusion and that dilemma is making you hate yourself , for not being strong ( shall i say that?) to make a decision.
Its time to take a chill.
Close your eyes.
Tell someone to look at your situation and advice.
The distant stand.
It seems to work.
It sometimes is the most intelligent decision.
But then why do i feel that it's not my decision. I know the advice was sound , perfect , yet there is this inhibition to move forward with it.
I think its time for a nap.

An Open Road

2008-08-25T23:22:00.003+05:30

I am always reminded of this when someone asks me "So whats up?".
It seems such a ritualistic question which either leaves me wondering about it or respond a "not much".
It's something i don't know where i have seen , if i have seen that is. Yet i see it clearly.

It's some vintage car , running in a desert. A straight black road. Straight. There is no sun, but there is some light. The more it moves on , the straighter the road becomes , but never to see an end. Just a straight black road , with no-one around , not even the sun nor the wind , with the sand just still. The stillness on the road is not disturbed for there are no passer-by's. No honking nothing.

And on the other side, and while typing this , I remember the old saying , "the grass is always greener on the other side ", there is a boulevard , and there is traffic as well , and there are people looking at each other. And there is the breeze and the spring or the rain sometimes . One can't listen anything on the road that runs parallel and yet one can see , sometimes that is , when one wants to that there is activity there.And he feels a little too alone. For no matter how fast he tries to drive , the road seems endless , no milestones as well. Just him and the road. An open road.

The KungFu Panda

2008-08-19T14:45:00.003+05:30

I have been with people who live in their past. They are basking in the glory of the sun which has long been set.It is not that they are oblivious to it , rather they know that their time is seeping away and will continue to do so, seep seep and then stagnate , yet they let it be.
They have forgotten for they have failed to realize their own self for they have not achieved anything new,the reason being that they have failed to make an effort. They could , for they had deserved their glorifying acts , they still can , yet they don't. they won't rather.
There is some kind of an inhibition in them, an inhibition( or may be a fear) that makes them forget their real selves , deteriorating from what they were meant to be. To them their future seems bleak , lost in the darkness of their inhibition which has let their sun set in reality , which they cannot see with the closed eyes they have started to look at this world with.

I saw The Kung Fu Panda yesterday and was touched by this quote which I dedicate to all the people who live behind those closed eyes:
"Yesterday is the past
Tomorrow is the future.
Today is a gift.
That is why it is called the present."

The Oil Effect

2008-08-03T23:22:00.001+05:30

From a global to a local world. Nothing more.

Creative Capitalism

2008-07-27T11:46:00.001+05:30

Creative Capitalism :::: By Bill Gates at Davos

So what if Pappu can't dance?

2008-07-17T09:32:00.000+05:30

What's wrong with Indian

2008-07-13T23:16:00.003+05:30

Nikunj at the Delhi domestic Airport.
Nikunj: What time is the next flight to Allahabad?
The 'Indian' aunty : Well it's at 2:30, but i wont recommend that flight, they switch off the AC at Lucknow... catch a train instead.

No wonder 'Indian' faces losses.

The real cause for inflation

2008-07-04T10:19:00.002+05:30

I recently came across an article which explained the real reason behind the inflation and the bear run in the markets.

Everything , happening around has this as the reason. READ

Let women of the world vow, to redeem the markets.....
Wear shorter skirts ..... in these turbulent times , its your moral obligation.

Insects!

2008-06-26T18:07:00.002+05:30

I have insectophobia. I hate them. In the past 3 months it has never been that my face has not been without an insect bite. Now , without all the marks of their bites remaining, my friends have forgotten how I looked earlier. Even I don't remember , rather I don't acknowledge any change.

They do not bite me below the waist. Never. But have a certain liking to pee their acids on my face , specially my eyelids. They know it will hurt me most over there. They even bit me once , on my eyelid, just above the eye. It was the most horrific. It has been always when I have been asleep.
I have found a solution. I do not sleep at night , lest they bite me again. I sleep during the day. I see the sun rise everyday. Only then do I sleep. The side-effects, I know , will be catastrophic....but at least my face would be safe.

I went to my professor asking to go home. I have already exhausted my leave. My reason was simple. I showed her my face. 3 months....and she knows that.
She didn't allow me. She did not stand up to her reputation of being a house-wife. I will curse her for this all her life ... probably beyond that as well. She cannot feel my fear for insects. Well may be the pigmentation loss around my eye did not allow her to see the truth in them. Anyways, she will be cursed.

I went to a doctor yesterday. Asked him for reasons. He said it was an unproven fact that insects will bite me whenever they get a chance. He blamed the statistics. At least now I don't have any moral obligation towards myself.

The Tilak

2008-06-18T00:11:00.003+05:30

I went to Prayag yesterday. Sangam. After staying in Allahabad for 2 years. Basically the motive was to go for boating.
One of my friends started to wash his sins. I did it too. Everyone else was doing it. Sometimes its better to join the crowd.
Then we went to the Hanuman Temple, which is quite famous as folk has it that the Ganga comes inside the temple to wash His feet. It was the second time in 2 years that I had gone to a temple.My friend's first.I put the orange tilak on my forehead.
We bought Masterstroke, Bacardi and Romanov. Had bought for five of us, was consumed between 3. I had left drinking, the excuse was to get totally drunk. It was the last time.
A peg, 2. Quarter. Half. another.
It sure was memorable , though nothing is clear in my mind.
The only thing that i remember is me staring at my face and the orange tilak on it.

Orkut v/s Facebook

2008-06-10T20:11:00.003+05:30

Orkut seemed lame a month ago.

Suddenly orkut has applications .
And not only that , it has themes and games.Thats all that i could discover without an orkut account. The reason i deleted mine was because it seemed lame to have exactly 1015 scraps for 2 months...not even forwards increased the count.

I switched to facebook which was considered a much sacred domain than orkut.

But orkut , suddenly seems interesting. I have seen people play teen patti, and play and play.

Plus change the themes in their homepage.

Suddenly, orkut doesnt seem lame.
And although initially it seemed that all the applications-thing was copied from facebook and myspace , it doesnt seem so anymore.
It seems to be more of innovation now.
Orkut has come back with a bang.
And now i repent deleting my profile. The 1015 could have continued a few more months.

2008-06-10T20:09:00.000+05:30

I woke up at 7!!!! I woke up at 7!!!!

Life these days

2008-06-08T00:51:00.004+05:30

It's been the nth time that i have cut myself with my razor , out of the n+1 i have done . The first time i shaved.....i remember my sister gifting(rather forcing) me to shave on rakshabandhan....it was a perfect shave.
Ever since then....i cut myself....everytime, without fail. I even bought foam yesterday....today i have 3 cuts...
My friends laugh at me , the only person who can cut himself with a vector plus.........here iam , this is me.

I sleep at 6 (in the morning). Read a comment in Pooja's. I felt ashamed that the world wakes up at that time. But I think I'll continue a few more days . The heat is terrible in the day.

Come wednesday, and i'll become a housewife(no offense ) . For 2 hours , i'll shop at big bazaar, inquire about food products having maximum discounts, i never buy things having less than 50% discount.....that's one of my principles( Wednesday because you get max imum discounts on that day, and this principle has an excuse of haldiram mathri's.) For 2 hours , I will be there with the Allahabad Aunties Association(AAA) checking out the prices , taking and giving a few suggestions , and sometimes playing around with their kids.

I don't like any food now, they all taste the same for me. El-Chico, Friends, Sizzler point,Punjabi,Tripathi, Canteen. Mom, I miss home. And the food.
For a change I have been to the mess for the last 2 meals. Why should i waste money when i don't like that food.

I started reading Ayn Rand, haven't made past 50 pages in the past 1 week. Her forceful writing induces sleep in me. And imagine, I like economics.

I tried Netbeans on Ubuntu. It's support for unicode sucks. Switched to XP, could not install sound drivers.....then there was no support at all for East-Asian languages.
After 3 days the system is fine now...

But the life and the routine is still the same.

Somebody jolt me.

1s

2008-06-05T00:09:00.001+05:30

Why does blogger show " 1 comments " ?
It gets on to me, more so because the number of comments i get on my blog rarely exceed "1 comments".

The real person

2008-06-01T01:37:00.002+05:30

Why is Rowan Etkinson( Mr. Bean) frustrated ? Rather depressed?
Who is the real Bean?
Why does life has such irony?

Tagged

2008-05-26T22:09:00.003+05:30

Q. Last movie you saw in a theater ?
A. Taare Zameen Par

Q. What book are you reading ?
A. The Rainmaker(John Grisham)

Q. Favorite board game ?
A. Chess

Q. Favorite magazine ?
A. Outlook

Q. Favorite Smell ?
A. Rain

Q. Favorite Sound ?
A. The Guitar

Q. The worst feeling in the world ?
A. Loneliness

Q. The first thing you think of/say when you wake up ?
A. 'Abhi Thodi aur der'

Q. Favorite Fast Food place ?
A. Friends

Q. Future child's name ?
A. Never thought of it.

Q. 'If I had a lot of money, I would...' Complete this sentence -
A. Buy a Lamborghini Murcielago

Q. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal ?
A. No.

Q. Storm - Cool or Scary ?
A. Cool without the dust.

Q. Favorite Drink ?
A. Orange Juice

Q. Finish this sentence - 'If I had the time, I would..'
A.Learn the guitar

Q. Do you eat the stems on Broccoli ?
A. No.

Q. If you could dye your hair any color, what would be your choice ?
A. Green and red

Q. Favorite Sport to watch ?
A. Soccer

Q. One nice thing about the person who sent this to you ?
A. A good person

Q. What's under your bed ?
A. A few polybags, a Hanuman chalisa and a duster

Q. Would you like to be born as yourself again ?
A. Absolutely.

Q. Morning person or Night Owl ?
A. Night Owl , but wish not

Q. Over Easy or Sunny side up ?
A. I hate egg.

Q. Favorite place to relax ?
A. Ma-papa's room.

Q. Favorite Pie/Mithai ?
A. mal-pua.

Q. Favorite Ice Cream flavor ?
A. Butter-scotch

The Swim

2008-05-25T02:31:00.002+05:30

I went for a swim after 8 years today.
I had learnt it , or rather was forced towards it, for 6 years of my life and had , learnt how to at least freestyle.
I was sure as I had heard, that one could , if learnt, not forget how to swim.

But as i had hoped against hope , I was there in the middle of the pool after a rather ill-executed dive wondering why i was drowning?
People around me got so scared and started the regular commotion.

It was at least a few seconds before I finally realized that I had to move my legs as well.

So typical of me.
Who said one could not forget how to swim?

Brida - money and time wasted

2008-05-23T23:22:00.003+05:30

Poelo Coelho has inspired me through his past books. The Zahir, The Alchemist , Veronika Decides to die , The Witch of Portebello , 11 minutes .... all had eternal meaning to life in them.
Unfortunately, either i could not understand what he wanted to convey....or there is no meaning at all, but Brida failed to meet my expectations.
May be the magic he wanted to cast in Brida , could not be done.
May be , as Wicca said.....the tradition of the moon is fast loosing to the tradition of the sun.
It sure has in this case.

The male menstruation cycle

2008-05-10T01:18:00.001+05:30

Well I was under the impression that only women undergo a menstruation cycle , it was only last week , and during my exams( wonder if exams are meant for this?) that i got to know that it is men as well who are going through a menstruation cycle.

This cycle does not include any ovulation or external release of any liquids or hormones....but i am sure that there is something taking place , internally , for sure.

It seemed to me a little strange that during my "periods" ( :-o ) , there were strange mood swings taking place ..... strange.... i would be a different person than I normally am.

I could go into bouts of self-introspection and wonder about stuff related to my hormones ( :) ), for around 2 days , just wonder about the missing link of me still being single.
These exams , unfortunately were a part of that "period" ( and that could be a nice excuse for my non-performance...ahem) .
On the last exam day , one of my batch mates ultimately noticed me being in that compromising situation ( i don't know why but i am remembering one of those sanitary napkins ads on television where a girl's friend ultimately notices it.......but whatever..) , and i wonder why only the last day , when my academic battle was lost , dropped the bomb ..... ......
" dude everybody goes through the period ."
And then everything came into perspective.....what a fool was i always battling between reality and reasoning about my status in every profile i have made , a major reason to delete some....for the repetition, for the reality as i had taken for granted was not based on reality..... which being the existence of the menstruation cycle in men as well.

Most of the problems that the men of today are facing are related to the inadequacy of knowledge about the male menstruation cycle in the society........wonder when would the society awaken to the needs of the poor men.
Till then......
Amen!

Colours

2008-04-26T19:52:00.002+05:30

We need colours in our life, or so we do.

To some the world is black and white. The world is easy to understand in just 2 colours.

It is black.

It is white.

Just like the days of the doordarshan where one could easily know who the hero and who the villain was.

Simple.

I sometimes wish that the world actually was bicolour. I did not have to strain my brain hard to judge the situation.

Not anymore.

It’s unfortunate, or should I say a reality, but everyone seems to have mixed up the two colours in their palettes , and all so disturbing is that the shades they come up are too dynamic.

Have i lost it?

2008-04-20T23:50:00.003+05:30

I think i have lost my touch with the blogging world......i want to post something meaningful but nothing seems to take shape.....
This craving to express myself....but don't know why i cannot.

The Bitter Truth

2008-03-25T23:17:00.000+05:30

Life wears no condom, unfortunately refrain is the best option.

I bid Adieu , My love - A geek's love Story.

2008-03-18T22:47:00.003+05:30

I got a new XPS 1530(blue color) yesterday. A beastly config of 2.4 Ghz core 2 duo, 4mb cache , 256 MB graphics card , 2 Gb ram....i cannot ask for more.

The transition from an Acer travelmate 250 to this one was quite smooth.
Its like Harry Potter has been gifted with a firebolt over the nimbus 2000.
But now when i touch the keypad....my fingers do not feel the same sensation Iam used to.
When I touch the screen , the edges do not give me the feeling of the leanly crafted archaic monitor..... the edges 0f the new one are too smooth....but the feeling is not.
When i see the screen ... it doesnt give the same soothingness of a humble, oldie.
The fan of the new one doesnt throw the hot air....of which my hand is so used to.
I miss you dear....you have been my best friend for the past 2 years....waking up with me and going to bed..
I remember distinctly , laughing at you with Sanjay for being so crappy.
I know i had cursed you as a heater for winters ( for your hot air), or as a dumble to carry around....but baby ...i'll miss carrying you in my arms....protecting you from the energy outside.
I now realize the effect you have had in me. You have taught me so many things....patience being the foremost....i thank you for that..
So now i have a laptop in true sense......but you will always, be in my heart , i'll miss you....my dearest DESKTOP( it's nickname.....for all the wrong reasons).

Midsem review

2008-03-18T14:10:00.004+05:30

GVC : dear PVC, we know you love astro-physics , but sir , we were giving a paper of graphics....not some 12th level kinematics.
COR : the simplest paper i can ever give. 20 fill in the blanks. Mr. PKM( guest faculty from IT,BHU) agreed that we people sleep in your class and act as stupid as we can pretend to be( or are we?)....but common, humaari bhi kuch izzat hai .... and considering the quality of paper , if it was genuine..... IT'ians suck.
SEN : hehe.... it was SEN( or did we say software engineering?).....next time Mr. Agarwal....shapath
DAA :Ms. VA we are not your 5th grade kids..... so set a paper which does not require us to draw .... and it's not history that you give such a lengthy paper.....its engineering.....but considering you....it's understandible.
ORO: Dr. Lahiri.....kuch to padhaaya hota class mein.....kuch....
Business System:...aka....fatta Systems.....Ms. Singh....you'll get to know our real creativity now...

case closed....

The weirdest thought

2008-03-01T19:53:00.002+05:30

Relationships have been bothering me for quite a long time. Not me exactly, but the people who matter to me.
There are relationships which have been covered with dust and suddenly, like the nostalgia felt when seeing your coloring book of kindergarten , has made us emotional and made us rethink.

There are relationships which have become a little volatile and all the energy and the disturbances which have been arisen , may be due to an internal or an external factor, has made us emotional and rethink.

And so when I was pondering on ways to waste my time efficiently , I just drew a co-relation.
Imagine relationships to be water. And our life to be 'climbing a hill' task; which actually is so, But relationships as water?
We climb up the hill and want to do it too. That is life. Increase our horizon.That's what is and should be task high up.
Water.
The natural tendency of anything is to have the minimum potential energy.
So water would naturally try to settle at the bottom of this hill.
But then we want to climb up.Who won't?
And we survive on water. A few days without it can make us die.
But then does that mean that we stay down the hill and just drink the water?
Absolutely not.
What comes to us as an answer is to carry a water bottle. And make it a point that we don't scurry up the hill and be careless enough to break this water-bottle. A balance has to be made to carry this water-filled bottle for the path up the hill is too rocky and harsh.

This bottle is our heart.

And so we won't then be like a reckless mountaineer who has climbed up the hill and has forgotten to bring water in his bottle , and standing at the top wishes that he could have had some water , but cannot.
Nor we would be like the mountaineer who is midway and has been careless to have broken his bottle.

Beacause, it is on relations ultimately that we survive.

Indian Classical Music

2008-02-04T15:28:00.000+05:30

I thank SPIC-MACAY to have organised a musical evening in our instiute and introducing us to the beautiful world of Indian classical music.
It is a general oblivion that the youth has towards our own music that we never venture outside the Metallica and Nickelback's.
Even the adventorous have only thought of John Denver or Enya. The total neglect that we have shown towards our culture on the whole has made us belief that our music is too slow and not worth spending time on.
And so, when we were forced to attend the concert by the authorities, the only thing that was on our minds was it being a waste of time.
As the artist started playing the Mohan Veena, a lots of giggles and chatters could be heard. Only once we started giving some heed to the artist and the near-to-real sounds that were coming out of the veena did students start paying attention.
And it was in those 1-1.5 hours in which we were left totally mesmerized that we realized how long we had been sleeping, not knowing what wealth we possess ,and thinking it as a dogma, have been loosing.

It's time we wake up.

Why?

2008-02-01T20:18:00.000+05:30

Why does He take away those whom we love.
When he gives us life, Why does he take it untimely.
We ask ourselves how we live, Why not how we die.
Why cannot doctors still diagnose diseases correctly.
Why do we forget that someday we too have to leave.
Why do we forget that all that we do is to live.
Why do we still forget.

I have heard enough fables why He takes away all those good people. But still I am not able to convince myself that she is no more.

I would remember her smile.
I would remember her grace.
I would remember the warmth she had around her.
I would remember her power to forgive.
I would remember the respect she demanded.
I would remember the person she was.

I repent now that I was not able to tell her what a beautiful person she was.

Quote

2008-01-28T00:38:00.000+05:30

My favourite quote for this week:::

"In this Information Age, Sheldon, We are the Alpha Males."

-----The Big Bang Theory

Reaction

2008-01-16T13:47:00.000+05:30

I came by this post by one of my friends a few months ago. At that time , I did not realize what it meant.
The post said that there is a certain transition that happens when we graduate from school to college. It said that one looses the individuality. To be accepted by all, and that is what most of want, one has to wear a smiling mask constantly.
One has to always accept the other person, his request , no matter how crazy that may be.
It happened with me today. And it was then that i realized the state of the author of the post i was referring to.
Not that the request that person made was completely crazy....but it was not a request, it was not humble, it was a directive, and considering the issue to which it related, only a humble 'please ' was what was required.
I rejected it.
Unfortunately , I have not been able to wear the mask of the college-goer efficiently.
Still, I express myself.
That does not mean I am the angry young man, I still remain to be the silent-mover.
But then you should not , and must not be taken for granted. I have my reservations for the people who can do that.
And this person did not qualify for that.
Till this you might be wondering..." whats the big deal! Cut the crap off."
The deal is that the person is not normally so. He is genuinely nice and sensible to understand such basics.
And then when I got to know that the person was "pissed-off" by one of my friends, I really was left to but analyze the situation , when my business system class was on.
The person was crazy on some thing...but that doesn't mean he should show his insanity in demanding from me what was my possession for that class.
Does this qualify as an excuse for what he did?
Does this justify my stand on refusing him altogether , and when informed about his unstable situation, still keeping my foot down...for I made an issue of it being about humility and humbleness?
Or is it fine for a person to express his anger in a situation which does not demand it?
It might sound childish but then sometimes adults are foolish enough to act so.
I have been thinking about this for the past 2 hours and the only blockage in completely agreeing with myself is that had I been in a situation where a special child would have behaved with me in the same manner and had I also been keeping the same stance, it would have been unjust on my part to act the way as I did.
But then the person in consideration is totally not that special.

TZP

2007-12-25T00:29:00.000+05:30

First of all a standing ovation to Aamir khan and the cast of taare zamin par for such a brilliant movie.

It is commendable that Aamir has made a film which is mostly non-commercial and which has touched the subject of parenting and children , which in view of the Gurgaon, Chennai and various other events where children have been involved as criminals and have attracted the limelight recently; in a beautiful and thought-provoking manner.

The movie is a reflection of today's society , with which people can connect easily, where a child can keep himself in the shoes of eshan, a mother in tisca's and a dad in the shoes of eshan's father.

Even though the mother of today is working or has an exposure/rendezvous in terms of a professional dimension(which was the target audience of the movie), she cannot detatch herself from her child, to analyze the problem/speciality. For her he is totally normal.So even though she is totally commited she channelizes his as well as her energies in the wrong direction, finally leading to her frustration. The child cannot tell her, sometimes he is under the wrong impression , as reconciled by Prasoon's eye-moistening lyrics ' main kuch na baloon , magar tu jaanti hai na ma'.He doesn't.

While the lady sitting next to me was rebuking eshan's dad, i could see in the character an Indian father who is aware of the competition and hence the misery which lies in the real world which is way beyond a child's dream world.He does not want his children to suffer as he had done, to slog during the day as he does, only to manage for his children a decent living.

He does not have much time left for himself , how can you expect him to analyze, distantly what his child actually needs ,where actually does the fault lie? Some may argue that can't a man find time for his children , who top his priority list? Well as was depicted in the film , a father always wants his child to be the winner....even if it means to be as hard as a coconut from outside. And sometimes , and more so often people forget what they had had in their minds when they had left their homes in the morning.And the only thing that they know, by what harshness this world has clutched them with, is that they want their children to be the best, they tell themselves this very thing time and again.

And as per the defination of a 'normal child' goes, as is presumed, understood and engraved in our minds,which we are made to believe that we are,though not just the normal, but the normal 'best',so that we can have a comfortable path ahead, the traditional, or the trendiest, or the highest paying , or the superficially attractive occupations are or sometimes have to be embraced,sometimes forcefully, from our childhood,and thus the genius that we were, in our own ways, in our childhood , be it in the field of instruments, even though we played awefully,or in the field of writing, even though our emotions were never understood by the literary meritoreous, or in the field of singing, even though we were cacaphonous, has to be killed.

And so we land up doing things that we did not want to. We just become programmed bots, who are competing for the best position, through their identical hardwares and softwares, which they have crammed and learnt.

And so the genius that the child was dies by his own hands.

The rising cases of teenage violence recently seen reflects the turmoil that takes place inside and which just finds an alternative vent.

The future seems dark, lest ,and hope, we find, in each home, teachers like Nikumbh, who teach children the art to live.